And then you get dropped...

I skipped blogging yesterday, because i was felling fuddy duddy.It all started on Monday when i received a call from my long time friend Avi , asking when last i heard from Vee ( i don't want to call any names), it dawned on me it wasn't for a long time. I was told that Vee was asked not to speak to me again, by the other half in Vee's life. Confuffled I didn't know what to think, was it true? It would make sense because Vee has been avoiding me. Is this what i am looked at as? A bad influence so much so that someone who doesn't know me, would ask someone who does to drop my friendship , like garbage at the side of the road? I am hurt, that's why i was down yesterday. But trying to be the positive person i am trying to be, I'll not let this get me down. If my 'friend' would like to drop me no problem. I will live my life the best way i see fit and you will live yours. It still hurts though. Am i such a horrible person?

Been down....

How do you please someone without giving up what makes you happy? How do you find the balance of me time and us time? How do you treat someone with continued respect when you feel so comfortable you can cuss in front of them? How do you apologize for words that were said in anger? How do you let go of the past? .....uggghhh...these are all the thoughts that are running through my head , guess what this relates to....yup...RELATIONSHIP.....I know countless books have been written, people make millions dishing out advice...but does any of it make sense until you as an individual decide ' hey i better put some of this into practice'...Lately looking back on my current relationship, I started out as quiet the respectable fella, always concerned about her well being, and her feelings...but these days....umm....lets say i am less concerned....ok...i admit it....these days i am a horrid boyfriend. I want to go back to the days i treated her like a princess, i want to make her feel special...I don't want to slack off, because I don't want to lose her.Its like sharks are prowling all around her waiting for me to fuck up to move in for the kill. I'm stumped...i need a book or a good relationship article about being a good bf. If i want this change i must make it, stop moping around....get up , get out there and make it happen. I am finally realizing that the power is within me....its within me to make my relationship be a good one.

UP

The cinema was really dark, i bumped into the wall upon entry- the long assortment of commercials were already playing, surprisingly most of the seats were filled....men, women, boys, girls, children...I guess most of us fell into the "Transformers sold out category" ...I didn't expect much from this movie, after all there were no monsters, talking fish, toys that came to life, dancing bugs...nothing of interest to me...I saw one preview before- I didn't like the fact that a grumpy old man was the star...It was going to bomb i thought. Like all Pixar movies there was a short before the actual film..it was called partly cloudy...funny as hell, i was laughing from the get go...no talking as usual, just some sound effects and facials expressions but it was funny, and contain emotion..little did i know it was setting the mood for UP. Up began right after, I sat back into my chair trying to get as comfortable as possible getting ready for the long haul, I didn't have any snacks to distract me so it was going to be one on one . At the end of it, i almost cried , it was such a feel good movie...it touched me in places only the lion king ever went , tugged at my heart strings- that's where it went, i caught myself hoping for the old man , no not hoping but wishing for him to succeed...I felt his pain and understood why he was so grumpy, each character brought something new, something to make the movie deeper than just a laugh fest. It was an incredible experience, I am sure everyone who was there was deeply moved ..I don't think transformers would have this kind of effect on me . I recommend Up to the highest degree, its a great family movie that puts life into perspective , and makes u thankful. As you can see i didn't go into the plot , don't want to give it away, but go see it before they replace it .

Flash Weekend

This weekend was the fastest weekend ever, one minute I'm falling asleep on Friday night, the next I'm waking up on Monday morning looking feverishly for clothes to wear to work. Before i continue, whats up with us Trinis being everywhere? If there is a war, we are there, if there is some world changing event we are there, now Michael Jackson's doctor is a Trini, o gawd we like salt in everything....I only hope that this doctor didn't screw up and cause MJ's death, then for sure it will be more hell to get a US visa.

This weekend, even though it had flash all over it-it was fun. Spent sometime with the GF, lip syncing (me, she was actually singing) Journey and the spice girls..plus some major awkward dancing. Then in the middle of it all, I realized hey I love this girl...yerrr it was one of those moments. Besides the impromptu concert I had to clean the yard, my uncles one year prayers is coming up on Saturday so its gonna be work work work, I've been staying away from meat for almost 2 weeks now...Glad to say that i don't miss it much, there are times i feel like ripping off someones head for a Boomers sandwich, but the urge goes away as fast as it appears. Maybe I'll try to go on as much as i can. But who can resist BBQ chicken? Not I ....yummy now my mind is on that.The weekend goes Way too fast, this Friday the Gf and I are going to a play..she's trying to instill some culture in me....its beauty and the beast....yerrrr....who knows it might be great, I'm keeping an open mind.

Family life is quiet, remarkably I'm getting along with everyone and my nephew and nieces are adorable.I may not be able to change a diaper, but i can sure make them laugh. Its fun to let go and become a kid again, when was the last time you saw a grown boy crawling around on the floor pretending to be a shark? Lol ....Here'ss hoping that this week is a positive one.

Appreciation

At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.:-Albert Schweitzer


This post is dedicated to my wonderful, beautiful, effervescent girlfriend. Yesterday when i was in pain, which BTW i still am slightly, she came over. Brought drowsy medicine, a muscle rub and gave me a massage....isn't that awesome? The we cuddled even thou i was very grump. I tend to turn into a grump when i am in pain. This morning i got up feeling much better. I just wanna say a big THANK YOU....its really the smallest things that count. I felt so loved and taken care of.....eeeeeee I'm walking on air .

You are a person
who makes life easier and better
for everyone around you.
Your continual acts
of thoughtfulness
and kindness
brighten each day.
What you did for me
will glow in my memory,
reviving pleasant feelings
every time I think about it.
I appreciate you,
and I thank you.

Swine Flu

As expected the H1N1 virus (swine flu) is spreading amongst the population, and as usual Trinidad and Tobago is in a state of unannounced panic. The swine flu has been around for a long time now, but this particular strain is new. Read about it on wiki. Honestly panic has risen inside me, its not actually contracting the flu that have me restless...its the state of our health care system ...no matter what the "wonderful" Jerry Narace says, the entire nation fully well know how awful the healthcare is. Therefore this treatable virus can turn deadly . While having dinner yesterday taking in the CNC3 news, many people were turned away from the different medical institutions because of 2 reasons, one there was not enough staff to handle the influx of visitors and the other being they were not considered being high priority cases. Let me expand on this point......when you go to the hospital/ clinic with flu symptoms, the nurse will ask you these simple 2 questions

1. Have you travelled recently to countries with the swine flu?
2. Have you been in contact with anyone who has swine flu?

If your answer is negative to each, a quick dismissal is what you are given instead of a real test. Yup this is how they determine whether or not you have swine flu or just the regular flu. So much was spent on the summit, while everything else is being neglected..... the future looks bleak as the Health care system will be pushed to its already dilapidated limit. One thing however can be sure private institutions and doctors are about to make a mint. The following are precautions that should be taken :

1. Wash your hands often with soap and water or alcohol sanitizer - this will kill most germs.
2. Avoid people who have a fever, cough, or sneezing, or complain of any flu-like symptoms
3. If you feel like you are developing flu symptoms, don't wait to see if it will just go away. Call your doctor or nurse practitioner and ask for advice or an appointment.( we know how this might go)
4. If you develop a fever of 100.5F or higher, call your doctor right away (day or night) and start drinking plenty of fluids. Stay well hydrated and get a diagnosis and treatment for whatever is causing your fever.
5. Stay home whenever possible.
6. When you cough and sneeze, cover your mouth and nose. Wash your hands afterwards.

And the symptoms are:

1. fever, which is usually high, but unlike seasonal flu, is sometimes absent
2. cough
3. runny nose or stuffy nose
4. sore throat
5. body aches
6. headache
7. chills
8. fatigue or tiredness, which can be extreme
9. diarrhea and vomiting, sometimes, but more commonly seen than with seasonal flu
10. Signs of a more serious swine flu infection might include pneumonia and respiratory failure.

Please take care of yourself and your family, especially young kids since their immune systems are not fully developed. Be safe and be blessed.

Click this link

I cam across this blog, i dunno how...i can't recall what i was searching for but it has made an impression. I hope everyone who reads my ramblings would visit and get a wake up call like i have done. I wish there was more i can do to make a difference, for now its all in the hands of the leaders of the world. This is the link

Kisha, Kisha be bi bo beesha....

I'm so happy i have my friend back, it was a very awkward when she called me to say hello, I wasn't expecting it .....I told her that, she was surprised....i felt stupid for thinking that our friendship was over, we decided to put "the incident" behind us. As the conversation progressed, our groove was found and boom, we were good again. ------this happened maybe a month ago, when i was in my 'what is blogger?' phase, we hung out last month in our usual Chaguanas...had lots of fun, laughing, running around crazy, her shopping and me looking like the boyfriend.....we talked .....we are good now....I learned that friendship doesn't just happen....you need to work for it, you need to work at it....

Its Fryday!!!

Hooray!! Fryday the day we fry stuff. OMG i feel so good today, it might be the clothes I'm wearing, might be the music on the radio, could be the fact the "witch" isn't here or maybe its just the large chocolate bar i ate for breakfast.....superteamhyperforcego!!.......Its super sucks that tomorrow is a Holiday, that holiday ain't doing anything for me, i don't work on Saturdays..i feel robbed....and the suckiest part is that this isn't the only holiday on Saturday, i think there are 2 more to come....nooooo I'm being robbed....well no need to get down and out about it, I'm still on my sugar high and it feels so good.Today's mission is just to pretend to work, and they will pretend to pay...it all works out in the end.Hooray for Frydays....

Happy Birthday....?

It was in 2007 this day that i decided to start this blog.....that's like 2 years ago...*gasp* have i been writing here for so long? Its really unbelievable, and still i feel like i havent gotten the hang of this blogging thing. But 2 years and going strong. Yay for me and a big Thank you to all those people that read my little nonsensical rants, sayings and paragraphs...its means alot to know that what i write is interesting, even if its just a smudge to other people....really amazing....Happy birthday blog....eeeeeeeee....i think i will get myself some ice cream to celebrate :)

Way back Wednesday

I cant believe its Wednesday already....the radio is on 95.1 , I'm enjoying my acquired taste for 80's music, I'm really into Journey now....wonder if they are still alive....I'll google it. Is it just me or are the days getting hotter and hotter...gasp...sometimes i drink so much water i feel like a big fat ball that just rolls around , and most of the times that is exactly what occurs -me lying on the floor and just rolling back and forth.....everything is so hot....something is seriously wrong with the weather. I haven't seen, heard, or smelled rain in what seems like forever...i miss it dearly...and from the looks of the grass and tress they miss it also.Saturday i did go to one of my buddy's sports day...i got burnt, the sun literally burnt me . We left early and went for ice cream a group of us....Hagen Daiz ( is that how u spell it?) ..one word....YUM...i never had ice cream like that before...u have to wait to be seated, they serve you, bring you free water...it was amazing, the price is steep, but somewhat worth it...i may use it as my treat when i do something extra awesome. My classes has begun , I've found a renewed excitement for the academics which is great--more motivation to study---Life is good...tomorrow we have Ramayan so I'm fasting , no meat...remarkably i don't miss it .....wooohoooo...

Now that its over

Carnival is over, so now what? People will regain their senses? Hell no...there is always another celebration around the corner. I just wish , eyes would open and someone would realize that this country is not safe anymore, for anyone. I miss going out. I'm scared for my life, for the lives of my family and friends. Its awful. I'm trying so hard to keep my head above all the negativiyt in my life but its becoming more and more difficult. Just a small prayer....God guide me, use your hand to lead on the path to my destiny , help me so that i may be the best person i can be.....dwell within me lord and keep the light burning bright within.