I'm a killer....

I killed a rat today....again....my confessions....

Sometime during this week i can't remember the exact day, i encountered a rat in my garbage bin at work...besides the usual screaming and running around, then getting a stick to poke at it to see if its alive...which it was and that caused more screaming and running around...i had to get rid of it. After careful consideration ( while my co worker was freaking out, by running in and out of the office, shouting at me to kill it, kill it) i decided to well, kill it...but how was the question...beat it with a ruler, staple it, throw paper clips at it, paper cut it to death? clearly the office had no weapons of mass destruction... then ding ding ding...water.... drown it. Lifting the lid off the bin and praying it doesn't jump at my neck and start gnawing ...i took it outside and filled the bin with water...i have a pretty deep bin...i just left him outside thinking that he will drown after a couple hours i proceeded to check on him, but there was Mr. Rat swimming around, like its a pool and he's on vacation...i needed my bin...i got a pipeline, i had to do the job myself...*gulp*...so using the pipeline to hold the rat under water i tried to drown him but these creatures are o so smart he started to crawl up the pipeline, before i realized what was happening his body disappeared up the line , panic stricken, screaming out no! no! no!, while hitting the line loudly against the bin trying to make it fall back in, cause god knows he was making his was up to my arm for revenge...but the frantic movements made him slip out ....wasn't going to make that mistake again, i used the edge of the line and held him under the water and after 5 mins he was dead ....it was pre meditated .... i took him back inside to scare my co worker a bit and then threw him in the bin. That was murder number 1....

Murder number 2

This morning after settling down at my desk, i was startled by the high pitched yelp of my co worker coming from the washroom...i was like huh wat the hell....then there it was again, that blood curdling scream that she has...so i run over to the women's washroom all hero like, when i got at the door, i was almost run over by her heading in the next direction....hey wats the matter, i said, trying to look as concerned as possible, because at that point i knew its some stupidness she's screaming about. What was the big hoopla about? A rat found its way into the ladies toilet bowl....hahahaha....could u imagine the position she was in before she discovered Mr. Man swimming around there...lol... since i have a reputation of killing stuff, they looked towards me to get rid of it....hmmmm, why me...i tried flushing it, but i think he was saying...hey who turned on the jacuzzi....they only thing left to do was get him out....he wasn't that big, not a full grown one...i got a bag stuck my hand in it, and then did the unthinkable stuck my hand in the toilet grabbed up the rat pulled him into the bag and tied it, all whilst i had 3 women screaming and one running to close her office door..lol... i couldn't leave him alive, i bashed him against the wall and he joined his friend in the dumpster outside....I'm sort of feeling guilty right now, but some candy will shut my conscious up.