Scars heal

The damage was minimal, why did i put up a pic...i wanted to remember the time i was weak, the time i gave up on hope and went back to the darkness i thought i left behind. I'm glad the knife wasn't as sharp as it could have been..i might have worse scars, physically that is...the emotional scars run deep, deeper than any knife can cut. Its weird i knew what i was doing was wrong, yet i continued relishing the pain...for some reason the physical pain made the emotional pain stop, even if it was just for a second or two, i kept at it for 2 days str8, using my same old pocket knife...not bigger than my index finger...isn't it ironic that when i bought it i thought hmm in case of emergency I'll have this to protect me and yet it was there aiding me in damaging myself..or saving me from getting the kitchen knife...either way i feel closer to it, the way a child gets attached to a teddy bear.I don't want to turn to this again to make myself feel better, i never want to do this again...so much time has passed since the last time...i thought i was over that....but i guess when u feel alone it comes tapping on your shoulder like a good friend with a warm, red, embrace.My reason for doing this is beyond me, i was just feeling alone, like there was no one else on earth who cared about me. But the feeling has passed and i realized that there are ppl out there who care, i was just too busy looking at the glass half empty to realize that there were ppl out there holding the glass out offering me a drink. To all my friends concerned thnks alot, its nice to know ppl care.